My journey has continued a great deal, and I've been learning a lot... so why haven't I been blogging?? I have no idea...
I'm going to illustrate my thoughts today by telling a fictitious example story, because when imagining how to describe with he/she/them's I got really overwhelmed... :)
I have been friends, acquaintances, and even in deeply-close relationships with people like "Moe." Moe continuously goes through life expecting the worst to happen to him. Every day, saying that something awful will happen, and surprisingly (though not so much), it does! With these low expectations in life, one would expect Moe to be prepared and handle the hardships he asks the universe for well, however this is not the case. Moe is extremely shocked whenever life throws him a curve-ball, and *get this* blames everyone around him for his misfortune. It is a truly tragic story. Moe is unhappy. Moe chooses to stay unhappy. Moe makes everyone around him, strangers and loved ones alike, unhappy, and Moe cannot figure out why he returns, time and time again, to this miserable state of being.
Those who care about Moe can see this, but are completely helpless, because conditions like these can ONLY be truly resolved from within. Moe may find a good day, week, or few months in a new distraction, but the lack of true self-awareness, realization, and understanding will make any sense of happiness fleeting and unstable. The worst part about this is that in the process of hurting himself, Moe also hurts and pushes away all of the people near and dear to him. He lives a life of constant destruction, like the Tasmanian Devil, tearing through people (even innocent strangers) haphazardly, and ending up standing alone, in the middle of the bloody rubble, angry at his victims, and still completely clueless to his true problems.
We all have a little Moe in us from time to time, and I know we all know or have known and loved a Moe before in our journey. I haven't quite figured out how to handle the Moe's in my life yet. I truly believe that this is a lot of what I am meant to be exploring right now. The only conclusion I have right now is to continue to express love to them as best I can, without subjecting myself to their abuse. Unfortunately, I have a complete set of issues that directly clash with true Moe's, so I have a really hard time knowing how to handle them. One thing I do know is that everybody needs, deserves and desires love, and although Moe's don't express love well at all, they still need it. Love is about giving, and not expecting anything in return. When it is returned, that is true beauty, but even when it is not... it is good and right to love.
This is something I have to train and re-train myself over and over. It is so easy to get self-righteous and give up on people because they have wronged you and what-not, but true character is shown in the difficult times, not the easy.
love. love. LOVE.
♥AshPiece
